Monday, February 25, 2008

Things I like

There are always new trends in the wedding industry. Some I like, some I don't. Some I would never even call trends, I would just call fabulous ideas that more should take advantage of. Below is a list of my current favorite things going on in weddings these days.

1. Secret Vows. It's mentioned below, but the full explanation of it is that along with exchanging formal vows with your officiant presiding, you also take a few moments of quiet time together (with music playing, perhaps after your unity candle lighting) to share your own personal vows only to each other. Marriage is between two people and I thought my couple a few weekends ago perfected this amazingly well. Beautiful. I hope it catches on!

2. The Walk Down the Aisle. Alone. (((Gasp!))) What?? Grandmothers everywhere are clutching their hearts in despair. How could she? Let's face it, today's modern bride may be a bit older, may be on her second marriage, and may very well be Miss Independent. The walk down the aisle alone is one that is breath-taking and poignant. I applaud those of you doing this for whatever reason it might be.

3. No More Boutonnieres! Guys don't typically like flowers. So why are we forcing them to wear one on the wedding day? Buck tradition and go for a coordinating pocket square instead. If you want a class act of pictures, you've got it with that! Mission accomplished. Oh, and your dads, groom, and groomsmen will kiss the ground you walk on for not flowering them. Did I mention the cost savings as well?

4. Seeing Dad for the First Time. We all know how special that first glimpse of the groom seeing the bride is, whether it's down the aisle or a meeting place beforehand. But how many daddy's girls are actually setting aside a special place and time for a father/daughter first glimpse? Not many, I know. That's why when I get to help set the stage for this first meeting, it takes my breath away every.single.time. With the photographer's assistance, those pictures are something to be cherished for a lifetime.

5. What Aisle Runner? Ladies, it's not necessary. Why do so many brides feel that they MUST lay down a piece of plastic or cheap fabric to walk on? And please do not subject the ushers or groomsmen to pulling it down the aisle prior to the bridal party entrance. Want to know why?...imagine the runner getting stuck on itself and now you have an usher or two on the floor trying to unroll it that way. If you must do a runner, go for something unique. Go for a sturdier fabric. Colored fabric! Have the aisle runner laid prior to the ceremony and ribbon off the entrance and seat guests from the side aisle if your venue allows. It's a dramatic entrance this way and much less worrisome.

6. Who Needs a Bridal Party? I am really loving this idea more and more. I love that couples are not finding it necessary to line up 6 women and 6 men in two lines and stand there during your ceremony. I love that I've seen couples get married without a bridal party. I love that I've seen couples get married with their bridal party standing in a semi-circle around them. I love that more and more couples are going with a Maid of Honor and a Best Man and that's it. I love that couples may have all male attendants or all female attendants because those are the important people in their lives.

7. Let Them Not Eat Cake. If you don't like cake, like so many of my clients say is true, don't get one. Save on your budget. Your favorite dessert is pecan pie? Serve that! Love ice cream? Do a sundae bar! Getting married somewhere known for their homegrown apples and cherries? I think cobblers are in order! A special dessert from your heritage? Put some meaning into what you're serving!

8. Keeping Things Moving. So many times couples forget when they are supposed to be introduced, when toasts are to be made, when the first dance is, when the cake-cutting takes place, etc. So I share with you my wise timeline for keeping things going, not losing your guests to lulls in the evenings, and most of all making sure these moments aren't forgotten if that's what you want. Be introduced as husband and wife as soon as your guests are seated for dinner. Proceed directly to your cake for the cake-cutting. Then proceed to the dance floor for your First Dance together. Take your places at your table while the servers serve the first course. While the first course is being eaten get all the toasts done right after another. This means by the time your second course comes out, you're done! You're free to eat, to converse with each other, to relax! Trust me, it works.


Tasha said...

Oh gosh... the aisle runner. Ushers rolled it out at a wedding I attended recently and it wouldn't roll correctly about a quarter of the way down the aisle. The wedding party had already walked down, and it was being unrolled just for the bride. They struggled with it for about two whole minutes. It was incredibly awkward and no one knew what to do. That's not what you want your guests to remember from your ceremony!!

Jessie said...

I suddenly feel very smart and cool :)

I'm walking alone, I was thinking about ditching the bouts, I don't like aisle runners, I'm on the brink of ditching cake, and your order for keeping things moving is almost identical to what I had in my head. The difference is no servers and I had no idea where to throw the toasts in, if anyone wants to even do them.

We aren't doing secret vows, but we'll do our pictures before the ceremony, and then go have some time semi-alone between the ceremony and reception while people are having some drinks and the food gets set up.

I have 5 months left. I can't believe I'm thinking of all this crap already.

Pam Archer said...

These are excellent tips, and I am 100% with you on every one of them. Times, they are changing, so planners need to pass this info along to brides. Thanks for a great post!

Pam Archer

Molly said...

Here Here on the secret vows, no cake, walking alone and the special father daughter reveal. As a photog - I love that moment!

Liz OGrady said...

I love your timeline!!

I teach ballroom dance and often suggest doing the first dance at the beginning of the reception, because then the "performing" is out of the way. The first dance is pretty much a performance, no matter how you slice it.

Your other tips were great, too. A big "YES" to keeping it simple and not feeling obliged to follow traditions that don't suit you. :-)

Darci said...

Great post! Everytime I read a post like this I feel lucky that I get to work with you :)

Sierra said...

Great post!

I totally lost it when I first saw my dad. I love the pictures of that moment and I'm so glad that my photographer captured it.

Angela said...

I like this post! I walked alone, I'm in a wedding this summer where it's just me and the best man, and we did things in the exact order that you described :)

Anonymous said...

Hi!!! I tagged you :)

Kathryn said...

What a fantastic list - thank you for sharing these new ideas!

Erin Nevicosi said...

I agree with the other commenters - a very good post indeed! Who says everything needs to be cookie-cutter?

Great list!